Rediscovered Quote

I'm in the midst of cleaning a desk and found several old notebooks from conferences I covered as a reporter. Written on the inside cover was this quote. It's probably not mine, but I'll claim it if no one else will. It sounds like something I'd write.

If you stand around waiting for destiny, you will only meet fate.

It seems appropriate today, as we start a new month. I've had a sense of destiny lately. Some things are clicking, and the revisions of my "completed" manuscript are moving ahead nicely, though I've put the work-in-progress on hold for the summer. Of course, as we discussed in a previous post, we're always writing and I know of some significant changes I'll be making to that manuscript once I return, and I'm sure it'll be much improved.

So, welcome to August, friends and fellow writers. What are you working on?

I Resolve to Call Her Up...

I'm not the biggest Police fan in the world, but I always liked the lyrics to "Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic." And the line "I resolved to call her up a thousand times a day" fit me pretty well when I was a teen resolved to not being stuck only with unrequited lust — though I was certainly familiar with it.

But as I grew older and wiser, bolder and wider, I recognized that I not only was capable of experiencing happiness, but also writing about it. So now that I'm a family man with responsibilities beyond the occasional blog post, I have gotten into the habit of writing down my resolutions.

Not everyone is a fan of resolutions and that's fine. I used to resolve to not make resolutions, and you might say I still do that: I write down my goals for the year, with target dates for achievement. I split them into work-related goals, personal and family goals, and writing goals.

I thought I'd share a couple here with you, and I'd love to hear what writing goals you have and are willing to share.

o Finish the first draft of my current novel in progress by 12/31/10. Right now, I'm at more than 25,000 words, which is probably about a quarter of the way to the goal. Not the ultimate goal for that particular novel, mind you, which I expect to clock in around 80,000 to 85,000 words. But I'm shooting for 100,000 in the first draft. From there, I'll need to revise. During my first edit of a manuscript, I try to trim about 10 percent of the words, which will hopefully account for the mess and repitition and all out crapola that's inevitable in first drafts. As Anne Lamott writes in Bird by Bird: All first drafts are shitty.

o Send at least one query out for my "completed" first novel by 6/30/10. This should be an easily attainable goal, but I'm a bit of a perfectionist (or maybe just a coward). In all seriousness, I made a conscious decision several months ago to not send any queries out in 2009. With my newborn daughters, I knew I'd have precious little time to spend on editing or revising the manuscript, and if I were lucky enough to get a healthy nibble on my hook, I'd be hard-pressed to reel it in with revisions while still feeding my girls and remaining married.

Ok, that's way too much about me. Please, let me know what you're shooting for in your writing in 2010. It doesn't have to be overly detailed. Maybe "Write every day," for example. Indeed, that's an excellent goal for any writer. I might just try that myself.

Not Quite, but It Was Worth the Attempt

Well, I didn't quite get to where I wanted to go with my 2009 attempt at National Novel Writing Month. I had less than a thousand words to go with five days in which to write them, but between babies and other family demands, I wasn't able to spare any time. That happens.

Much thanks to all those who joined me in this and encouraged me to keep at it. I know several of my NaNo buddies topped 50,000, including a co-worker who I suspect is quite proud of herself — and justifiably so. She knows that 50,000 words is just the beginning; there's more to be written, revised, shaped, and decided. A novel doesn't happen in a month, but the writing can.

Congratulations to all you NaNoers who put in the time. Whether you completed the 50,000 goal or not, you should be applauded for making the attempt. While that's all well and good, if you truly believe you want to write a novel, keep going, regardless of your "winning" status. On the NaNo site, they often mention that "December is for revising." (Or do they say 'editing'? I may need to revise that.)

For me, I have 9100 words that I didn't have on October 31. That's on top of the 15,000+ words I'd written for this manuscript last November. Who knows what the next tweleve months have in store for me. I'd like to believe that by next November I'll have finished this particular manuscript, or at least written too much more to use Nano to complete it.

What have you written lately? Please share a story about your latest story.

A Dark and Stormy Contest

This is always a funny story that causes me to wince. If you've not heard of the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest, check out their Website. They have a good sense of humor.

For those who don't know already, Edward George Bulwer-Lytton wrote what is widely regarded as the WORST opening sentence to a novel in the English language. It's not simply bad that it starts "It was a dark and stormy night," but the opening pales in comparsion to what follows:

It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents — except at occasional intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the housetops, and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness.

Anyway, this year's "honorees" for the worst opening sentence of includes this wondershot: "Theirs was a New York love, a checkered taxi ride burning rubber, and like the city their passion was open 24/7, steam rising from their bodies like slick streets exhaling warm, moist, white breath through manhole covers stamped 'Forged by DeLaney Bros., Piscataway, N.J.' "

I wonder if the Washington writer who won also submitted his purple prose to the bad sex writing contest. If you go there, wear protection.

I realize these people are purposely writing this poorly, but it still makes me ill.

It's Good to Be Back

I know I said that I'd be reading my own work — and I did, for a couple days on the train. I should have continued with my work, because it's clearly better than what I've been reading lately. Well, I enjoyed the Christopher Moore book, so I shouldn't lump it in with the others.

I completely hated one nonfiction book that I'd read with the intention of reviewing. It should never have been published, at least not in the appalling condition in which I found it. I won't review it. And I struggled to finish another book, Cooperstown, which was tangentially about baseball. Perhaps I needed to see the problems that arise out of bad structural choices in a novel.

But this morning I began something new on the train, Joe Hill's 20th Century Ghosts. I'm only in the first story, "Buttonboy," and already I'm enjoying it more than anything I've read in the past two weeks — including my book, including Chris Moore. Earlier this year, I read Hill's novel, Heart-Shaped Box, which I found entertaining and enjoyable.

While Hill is the son of writers (Stephen and Tabitha King), he hasn't relied on his father's fame to get noticed. He's done quite well for himself already, and I expect he'll provide many enjoyable works of fiction in the future. While he may never write Pulitzer Prize winning literature, if nothing else, he's provided me with a welcome respite from poor and mediocre writing.

Thanks, Joe.

It Was a Dark and Stormy Contest

Once again, the annual Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest has crowned a new ... er ... winner. In case you're too strong a writer to wonder about this, the Bulwer-Lytton is the Razzie Award of writing, the Harvard Lampoon of literary hackery, the ... oh, you get the idea.

It starts from the premise that "It was a dark and stormy night..." may just be the worst line ever written to begin a novel. Each year, aspiring literary spider monkeys (who like to toss around a bit of fecal matter) send out into the world their worst efforts at the opening line of a novel. (Apparently, you can make this shit up.)

No, I did not enter the contest.